DCFunemployment

@lovelianca and @johnnyanastacio were so nice!! #fashionawardsmd...

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 22:31:54 -0400

@lovelianca and @johnnyanastacio were so nice!! #fashionawardsmd #lookingFierce #JustFab

Snack time!! (at The Cloisters Apartments)

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 18:11:55 -0400

Snack time!! (at The Cloisters Apartments)

Support: @HartSpeax as a @RAW_artists on June 23rdView Post

Tue, 18 Jun 2013 13:48:56 -0400

Support: @HartSpeax as a @RAW_artists on June 23rd

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Brunch with the blogging bestie!! #candybdayfestival (at...

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 14:12:01 -0400

Brunch with the blogging bestie!! #candybdayfestival (at Shaw’s Tavern)

Awesome Alert: Fortique - A new boutique for Services

Thu, 13 Jun 2013 18:13:39 -0400

Awesome Alert: @Fortique A new Boutique for Services

I recently had the pleasure of meeting with Stephanie of an awesome new online marketplace called Fortique!! What is Fortique you ask? Well in their own words – “For·tique \fȯr-ˈtēk\ (n) – an online marketplace for local talent and creative services”. It…

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Late night snack @cheesecake after seeing @thisistheend #yum (at...

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 00:41:38 -0400

Late night snack @cheesecake after seeing @thisistheend #yum (at The Cheesecake Factory)

Event: @DCScout 5th Anniversary PartyView Post

Mon, 10 Jun 2013 23:59:05 -0400

Event: @DCScout 5th Anniversary Party

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DC Scout 5th Anniversary Party

Mon, 10 Jun 2013 23:34:08 -0400

dcscout:

Join us for DC SCOUT’S 5TH ANNIVERSARY! We’re rolling out the red carpet at the Renaissance Dupont Hotel with 15 pop-up gifting suites and beauty lounges. Snag your tickets before they’re sold out!

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So excited!!

"One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to..."

Fri, 07 Jun 2013 01:54:51 -0400

“One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
Love, Dad.”

- Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love” (via mydemisee)

So true!!

Omg pause for food!! #shutthefrontdoor #foodporn...

Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:38:12 -0400

Omg pause for food!! #shutthefrontdoor #foodporn #smellslikeheaven (at The Coupe)

The tree outside my balcony is blooming #finallyspring...

Mon, 13 May 2013 11:24:45 -0400

The tree outside my balcony is blooming #finallyspring #greatview now I just need the sun to come out (at The Cloisters Apartments)

Finished in 3:10, got my @tiffanysandco and my #gobare…...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 13:37:32 -0400

Finished in 3:10, got my @tiffanysandco and my #gobare… time to eat!! (at The Cloisters Apartments)

Over halfway there #werundc #blackgirlsrun @tiffanyandco (at...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 08:50:50 -0400

Over halfway there #werundc #blackgirlsrun @tiffanyandco (at Nike Women’s DC Half Marathon 2013)

Favorite shirt so far… #werundc (at Nike Women’s DC...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 07:25:46 -0400

Favorite shirt so far… #werundc (at Nike Women’s DC Half Marathon 2013)

#werundc

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 07:22:18 -0400

#werundc

Weekend brunch and day drinking with @kevlive (at Masa 14...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 15:10:07 -0400

Weekend brunch and day drinking with @kevlive (at Masa 14 Roofdeck)

Event: City Paper’s Best of DC Fete @WCP @BSmithsdc...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:52:18 -0400

Event: City Paper’s Best of DC Fete @WCP @BSmithsdc @SouthMoonUnder @PJClarkesDC @JackRoseinDC @ZENGODC

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Event: City Paper’s Best of DC Fete @WCP @BSmithsdc...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:42:19 -0400

Event: City Paper’s Best of DC Fete @WCP @BSmithsdc @SouthMoonUnder @PJClarkesDC @JackRoseinDC @ZENGODC

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#Bostonmarathon #Boston #tribute #halfmass (at McPherson Square...

Tue, 16 Apr 2013 20:47:24 -0400

#Bostonmarathon #Boston #tribute #halfmass (at McPherson Square Metro Station)

So obsessed with this @byMaleneBirgers dress I found in...

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 14:37:24 -0400

So obsessed with this @byMaleneBirgers dress I found in @mulehboutique (at Muleh)